Reconnecting in your relationship. I watched a movie on Netflix recently “The last call for Istanbul” which focussed on a husband and wife trying to reconnect and rediscover themselves and their relationship when it seemed like nothing was left. At the end of the movie the husband wrote a letter which went like this:
“[Y]es, we both had dreams when we first met and eventually we had to give up on some of them. And could we have done better than just blaming each other I don’t know. One thing I do know is that couples who do achieve getting old together also fight. They too become tired, bored and eventually want to give up. There’s only one reason why they don’t do it. They believe they will still be there for each other at home even after everything and everyone has gone. Isn’t this belief precisely what you call love and passion and what I call home. I wanted us to believe this; so much. To say to the world we are one.”
In the intricate dance of life, relationships can sometimes lose their rhythm. The daily grind, stress, and responsibilities can create a disconnect leading to a sense of distance and disengagement. This is where the rouble lies. Because the longer you leave it here – the harder you have to work to pull things back into place.
And whilst it isn’t impossible it does require effort and a willingness on both of you.
So what can you do to get back to the way things were? Reconnect. Try stepping out of your comfort zone. Plan a surprise date, embark on an adventure, or simply spend quality time together. Sometimes, all it takes is a change of scenery to reconnect on a deeper level. But more than this, it requires you to be vulnerable with each other. To talk, to share and to communicate. Which can be hard when you find yourself looking at your partner wondering what in the world you are going to talk about. (If this is you fear not, I have a list of conversation starters here you can download for free).
But once you have overcome this, it is important that you do the work to keep the connection alive. Why? Because it helps:
Preserve the Spark
Your relationship started with an undeniable spark, an electric energy that drew you together. Over time, however, the spark can fade as routines set in. Reconnecting allows you to rediscover that initial magic, breathing life back into your relationship. It’s a chance to revive the excitement and passion that brought you together in the first place.
Prevents Drift
Much like a ship needs adjustments to stay on course, relationships require regular tuning. Without intentional efforts to reconnect, you may drift apart. Taking the time to reconnect serves as a course correction, ensuring that you both are sailing in the same direction, sharing the journey rather than navigating separate paths.
Fosters Emotional Intimacy
Emotional intimacy is the heart of a strong connection. When you are caught up in the whirlwind of daily life, emotional closeness can take a backseat. Reconnecting provides an opportunity to share thoughts, feelings, and experiences, creating a deeper understanding of each other. This emotional intimacy strengthens the bond between partners.
Builds Resilience
Every relationship faces challenges, whether they be external stressors or internal conflicts. Reconnecting acts as a foundation of resilience. It establishes a sense of unity and support, making it easier for you to weather storms together. When you are connected, you are better equipped to face challenges as a united front.
Nurtures Growth
People grow and evolve over time, and so do relationships. Reconnecting allows you to grow together rather than apart. By staying attuned to each other’s changing needs, dreams, and aspirations, you can adapt and support each other’s personal and shared goals, ensuring that the relationship remains a source of mutual growth.
Rediscover Each Other
In the hustle and bustle of daily life, it’s easy to lose sight of the unique qualities and quirks that initially attracted you to your partner. Reconnecting provides an opportunity to rediscover each other, to appreciate the individual journeys you’ve taken, and to fall in love with new facets of your partner’s personality.
Remember, the importance of reconnecting in a relationship lies in its ability to rejuvenate, strengthen, and sustain the connection between you. It’s a conscious choice to prioritise the bond you share, fostering a relationship that not only withstands the test of time but continues to flourish and grow. This is exactly what we cover in Relationship Reset.